Who Am I?

When I recently asked friends on social media for topics to help quell this months-long writer's block I’ve had, one of them commented that she didn’t even know I am a writer and she would like to hear more about “who is Amanda Hensley”, so here goes:

On the surface, I am a curmudgeonly 40-something-year-old veterinarian who wishes to be known as almost anything other than a vet. It’s a profession that can be all-consuming, and it has been my identity for more than 15 years. When I couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that I had to leave practice, a friend told me that he believes people are meant to reinvent themselves over and over again. This spoke to me, since I had already done this several times in my career. I started out in a general mixed animal practice, switched into physical rehabilitation, studied Chinese veterinary medicine and became certified in acupuncture and food therapy, worked for a rehab practice, and eventually started my own practice. After doing so many different things and still finding myself deeply unhappy, I knew without a doubt that leaving medicine was the next step for me. 

Elmer getting acupuncture

I sold my veterinary practice just before COVID and started making a change into scientific writing, but as with most things, the pandemic complicated that and I find myself 5 years later still trying to escape the grip of the industry that has broken my heart at least a million times in a million different ways. 

I’ve also worked in market research (which I surprisingly really enjoyed), in a healthcare PR firm (less enjoyable), as a bartender (fun, but only for a while), and I am now learning about landscape design as a new career option, while continuing to grow as a writer. 

On a deeper level, I am out here just trying to live life on my own terms whether it makes any sense or not. Much of my life has been focused on managing crippling depression and anxiety, which I can now proudly say is mostly under control and doesn’t rule my every waking moment like it used to. It is still a big factor in day-to-day life, and I still often struggle with my sleep, self-esteem, and sense of self-worth, but I am mostly OK. I am sometimes a little lonely, wishing for a partner to adventure and go through life with, but for better or worse, I put almost no effort into meeting men, nor am I willing to settle for anyone that doesn’t easily fit into the life I’ve created for myself.

Besties!

Though I am not very close with my family, I have the most incredible chosen family imaginable. I have a tight-knit group of friends in Colorado, my childhood besties in Tennessee that I talk to literally every day, and many newer, but no less important, amigos in Ecuador. I make friends everywhere I go and though I am introverted and perhaps a little quirky, I am generally pretty mellow (unless I am hangry) and I can get along with almost anyone. 

I am too soft-hearted for my own good most of the time. I give my heart entirely to whomever needs it (mostly animals), leaving me with frequent fractures that never seem to heal. I don’t consider that a bad thing, though, because I believe grief is the price of admission for love. I even cry a lot when reading historical fiction (my favorite genre) because I fall in love with characters and hate seeing them suffer.  

I am probably the only pet-free veterinarian you know. After my last dog, Murphy, died three years ago (preceded by my soul dog, Tucker, and my two horses from childhood, Blackjack and Earl), I dedicated myself to not getting any pets at least until I had the time to travel freely for a while. I’ve since realized that as much as I love pets, being responsible for them causes me great anxiety, especially when I face hard anxiety-inducing decisions every day as a practicing vet. 

Mr. Orange

I did, however, recently take on responsibility for three cats here in Ecuador to keep them from being “re-homed” to god-knows-where from the only home they’ve ever known. I still don’t want any pets, but I am already grieving the loss of a big orange cat I barely know while happily serving as a hospice house for him, as cancer slowly but surely brings an end to his 14+ years of life. Not too bad for an outdoor tom cat in rural Ecuador.  

Quality of life is something I think a lot about - both for people and animals. I love learning people’s stories and helping make symbiotic connections between them. Not necessarily in a “love-match” kind of way, but friends who have something in common but haven’t met yet, or matching someone with their perfect pet, for example. In that same vein, I dream of starting a nonprofit to help pair senior homeless pets with senior people at risk for loneliness, and then provide whatever support they need (medical care or otherwise) to sustain the relationship and benefit both parties. No animal should spend its golden years slowly dying alone in a shelter, and no human should have to suffer from loneliness when there are 8 billion people on this earth. Of course, funding is the issue, so if anyone knows someone wanting to make a large donation to a dream, hit me up! 

I also love to travel. In my short time on earth, I have been fortunate to travel more than most people I know. One of the great privileges of my life has been visiting some off-the-beaten-path places most people never go - visiting school children in rural villages in Ethiopia, a trip to Antarctica with 100 other incredible women leaders in STEMM, and to one of the most beautiful beaches I have ever seen in Cuba.  

I’m an amateur woodworker and enjoy building weird little pieces of furniture. My last big project was to build a mini library complete with a ladder inside my tiny house in Colorado. As my friend Beth would say, it’s a little “extra” but it was a fun project, and I love climbing up my little ladder to water my plants. I am a huge plant nerd and have one on just about every surface of my house. I’m very curious about people and the world, but often have trouble being present while my brain swirls with all the things I should be doing, all the questions I have, and all the things I don’t know but want to learn. 

So there’s a little peek into who I am. In a nutshell, I am someone who cherishes connection, feels deeply (often to my own detriment!), and though my route has been winding and, at times, unconventional, it has forged a path that is authentically mine.